The need to belong

Miranda hands

Everyone feels the need to belong.  That is a natural feeling.  That is why lots of people join churches, activity groups and even universities.  The problem comes when your desire to belong comes at the expense of excluding others.  There are many organization/groups that try to make you feel so special for joining them that they create a sense of separateness between you and others.  This is when your ego gets in the way.  In reality no one has any more worth or value than anyone else.  We are all in this life school together.  Our society will throw money at people it deems more worthy.  However, those people who grow to that societal status can just as easily fall.  If they get sucked in to that false sense of superiority, then the money doesn’t matter.  It is their ego that is being feed and not their soul.  And even though they may be ‘special’ according to society, they will not be fulfilled and will probably do something to sabotage their societal success.

What we don’t realize when we are desiring to belong is that if we are searching for that belonging from others, we will never achieve it.  That need to belong is coming from within us and the only place to find it is within ourselves.  Yes, it is usually much easier to try to accumulate outward things to feel better, but those things will keep us on an endless search and will distract us from our true quest.  This is not an easy path to take, but it is the only path that will lead to true happiness and belonging.  Maybe it is time to take a look at our lives and see which path it is we are on.  Are we on the path of inclusion, love, equality and unity or are we on the path of division, ego, inequality and separateness?  If you examine your life and decide maybe you are heading down the wrong path, it is never too late to take a detour and head in a different direction.

You can start by looking at what your true motivations are.  Are you motivated by love and helpfulness or are you motivated by fear and greed?  Then you can slowly make the changes in your life that will head you in the right direction.  The first and probably most important change is being aware.  Be aware of why you make the decisions you make and change your decisions based on your new motivation.  This is the best place to start getting your life headed in the direction you desire.  It will take some practice and it may take a while, but it will be worth it.  And if you are a member of any group that promotes exclusion of others, you may want to rethink your involvement with that group.

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